Ayi Day

Hello Everyone! I know it has been a while since I have wrote an update, but being the mother of toddler leaves little time to do much "fun"work. Although this update isn't an update on Kyle, I wanted to share what was on my heart.

 There is a wonderful organization called The Sparrow Fund. They support adoptive families and children in China who are waiting on their families to find them. They have a program that is going on right now called "Ayi for a day". Ayi is what the care givers in China are called that works at the many orphanages in China. 50 people sign up and 50 Ayi kits are mailed to them. Each kit has items in them related to China and the Ayi's. These 50 people will pray for the Ayi's and return the sleeve clovers (the Ayi's wear these over their arms to protect their clothing while working). The sleeve covers will then be taken to China and given to a Ayi in October. Of course I HAD to be apart of this!

As I received my kit today I was very excited to open it. I knew there would be cool items in their that Kyle would love to see. I read over all the information and then started to unpack my kit. What started as pure excitement turn into a deep sad heartbroken feeling as I carefully unpacked each item. You would have thought they were made of delicate glass that would break if you looked at it hard. Each item I took out I saw a woman in China using each item. My heart and mind thought  about the two Foster Mother's Kyle had and the wonderful Ayi's at the SWI that took care of him. How many times had he seen them drink tea? How many times had they fed him chop sticks and taught him how to use them? How many times did they use tissues to wipe his tears or nose? How many times had they given him a piece of candy or a cracker? I can not imagine their heartbreak wondering about a child they cared for until his forever family got to him.

Although I am blessed to be able to stay in touch with his last Foster Grandmother, I most likely will never know they first woman who took care of him. I pray that God will give them both peace and that they will know that he is loved and cared for. I pray for all the others that are there as I type taking care of these precious angels. I pray they see the worth in each and every child no matter what their special needs are. I pray they love and care for them as our Father cares for us. I pray that God will give them the knowledge and guidance to care and lead them. Most of all I pray God will make his self know to them in a real way so they can teach each child about him.

THANK YOU to the Sparrow Fund for reminding me of all the ones left behind to do God's work until families are united!

Thanks y'all! :)   I promise I will do an update soon! I just knew all I was feeling was way to long for a Facebook status LOL

Love
Charm

1 YEAR UPDATE

Hello Everyone,

Sorry to be a little late on doing my one year home letter, but mommy wanted me to wait until I went to see Dr. Marcus and his team at Duke before writing to you.

Dr. Marcus said I am doing great! He said I have come a long way since my last visit with him. He said I have had awesome speech therapist’s that have taught me well.  I still talk some through my nose but he is proud of what I can do in such a short amount of time. He told mommy and daddy not to be worried about anything yet because I had learned to talk with a new mouth and language for nine months and I was doing outstanding. I’m not sure what the word “remarkable” is but that’s what he called me.  Mommy and Daddy agreed so it must have meant something good. I go back in December for them to recheck my ears to be sure my tubes are still ok.

I have done a lot in my year home. Some of my favorite things are swimming, riding a horse and  I LOVE this day you call Christmas and birthday!! People gave me toys that were all mine!!  We also had a lot of good food. The BEST thing I got to do was go to Florida! No, I did not meet Mickey Mouse. I met my grandparents!! (my daddy’s parents) Oh boy do I love them!! Papa rode me on his tractor and we got to haul rock and spread it. Grammy rode me on her golf cart! I loved her golf cart so much that I had to have one on my birthday cake. She made me a big chicken they kept calling a turkey. Boy was it good! I ask everyday if we can go see them again. They tell me it takes a long time to drive to Florida but I hope I get to go see them again soon. We had snow too! I love throwing snowballs at everyone. Mommy told me we hardly ever get snow here in SC. She said that the snow loved me so much, it had to follow me from China. I know this must be true because my sissy didn’t know how to get the sled to go down the driveway. I could tell she hasn’t played in the snow much. I also have some dislikes! I do not like shots or that big white thing that mommy calls the Easter Bunny! Although, I did enjoy the candy he brought me. I went to the circus and I even got to ride an elephant! It was a lot of fun.

I have a lot of new sayings now too. (Most are from Daddy and Sissy) “I’ll be right back y’all”, “wait one minute”, “DUH”, “Yeah” and “Shut your mouth”. However, I did learn this weekend that I can’t say that one to mommy! Only daddy can! I am working on my “ok”. Everyone hears it as “yo hey” but when I slow down and try hard I can say O K!

I also graduated K-3 last week. I love my school and teachers. I received the “Smarties Award” at my end of the year school program. Ms. Betsy told everyone that I got the award because I am a smart boy. I will help my friends with cutting and writing their numbers when she is busy with someone else. I love to help my friends. I am so happy they will be letting us go to school during the summer too. We are going to have a lot of fun!

Well, I better get back to playing. I want to see if Daddy & Mommy will let me watch Paw Patrol for a little while. I hope you all have a great summer. Remember, if you go outside and get hot all you have to do is sit in the fridge and it will help cool you off.

Love to you all,

 Kyle

"Name one word that adoption mean's to you"

What a difference a year makes!! It seems like yesterday we held Kyle for the first time, and now he has been home a year! He has learned so many phrases and truly is a southern boy now. I love seeing the look of love and happiness in the eyes that once pierced my heart with sadness. Him KNOWING that he is loved, wanted and belongs means everything!

As we celebrate his one year anniversary, I have been thinking of an answer to a question I answered when we were in the paperwork process. “Name one word that adoption means to you”. At that time I came up with the normal answers. Love, Family, Belong, Wanted, Blessed, Forever and Chosen. These   are all true statements. However, today the best one word answer I have is OBEDIENCE.

 I think of our journey and everything we went through and it was obedience that got us to where we needed to be. But, Obedience is not only effecting your life, but those you come in contact with. If my dear friend did not obey and adopt her “sassy peacock”, then who knows if we would have adopted Kyle! See her and her husband obeyed God no matter what people said! They gave her daughter a very slim chance of ever being normal. They told her she would never walk, talk, or even sit up. The people in Chin@ even tried to “give her another one” on Gotcha Day. But they followed God! During this trip they visited a popular foster home in the town where their precious baby girl was from. The pictures they took there is what God used to show us we were to adopt. At the time, we knew nothing about adoption. We saw a little boy that we KNEW was ours. We were walking by faith and we knew even though everyone said it was impossible to get this child that God was going to do a miracle and he would be ours. I prayed and asked God to show me what agency we were to use. I ran across an agency that had a symbol on their site that was the same symbol of the foster home in Chin@. I knew at that moment that was the agency we were to use. This part of the story you know. Our case worker called in November 2012 and told us she had a file of a little boy she wanted us to look at. I will NEVER forget the day and the days that followed.

 This part I haven’t shared before. We opened his file and he met the specific’s we were looking for. However, he was not the little boy WE picked out. Now this is where OBEDIENCE steps in. All the questions over whelmed me! Do you believe God for the one you thought was yours? Is this your son? What about Faith and believing God for Miracles? EVERYONE in my family thought the 1^st boy we saw was ours! Am I letting them down if I say this is our son? God knew right where I would be when Kyle’s file came in. I was working a holiday fair with two dear adoptive mothers and some very close friends that are my family. My sister from another mister gave me advice I will never forget. She told me to go home and sleep with Kyle’s information and for me and Todd to pray! That’s what we did! That night will forever be in my mind. Both of us put our hand on the file and prayed before we went to sleep. I remember us sleeping with the file in between us. Every time I woke up during the night, I would search for those papers. God bonded me with MY son that night! I never said anything because I didn’t want to influence Todd in any way. All that weekend I got encouragement from those around me. They prayed for us and gave me wisdom and just let me talk out all my fears.  That Sunday we were sitting on the couch watching TV. I received a text from Todd. (YES, he was sitting right beside me lol) It was the picture of Kyle and a note that said “Momma, come get me”.  When we told everyone, there were some that just gave you the look like “are you sure?”. I could read their minds. They were wanting to say “well what about “the one” you saw first? Aren’t you going to believe God for a miracle? Why are you giving up? IT IS HARD to look at the people you love more than life itself and stand your ground and obey! If we would have went by what man thought, we would have turned Kyle down and still wouldn’t have got the first little boy. (I am happy to report that his family found him and he went home in December of 2013)

Sometimes obedience isn’t easy! In fact it is VERY hard! What we have to remember is to put God first. He has our whole life planned out for us. All we have to do is obey. He is the only one that knows what He wants us to do. It’s up to us to pray, LISTEN, and obey. Not only for you, but for all the others that He has planned for you to touch. God only knows how you can affect someone else. That affect could be positive or negative. Let’s strive to be a positive effect on those around us.

We can’t imagine life without Kyle! There is not one doubt in my mind that he is the one God created just for us! He is full of life, funny and very entertaining. I thank God every day for the opportunity to pray to a living God that has us all in the palm of his hand. Intertwining life’s together for His glory.

Kyle will be doing an update soon of all the fun things he has done in a year! I just wanted to share what was on my heart!

Love,

Charm

Kyle and his sassy peacock!

Happy 1st birthday ever Kyle :)

I know many of you are reading the title to this post and saying "but he turned 4...how can this be his first birthday?" Then other's of you are thinking"oh its because he was an orphan and never had anyone celebrate him".  Well let me explain. In Chin@ they don't celebrate birthdays like we do. On the Chinese New Year everyone turns another year older. The don't celebrate the date they were born So this was the first celebration of his actual birthday! Let me say we were overwhelmed at everyone who showed up to help us celebrate! We are so honored to have so many people who love him. He had a great time at a simple party at McDonald's in the play area. When we got home he said "Momma, I had fun! I LOVE birthdays!". Such a simple statement that made my heart burst.

As so many of us adoptive Momma's do, I thought about the woman on the other side of the world that gave birth to my sweet boy. I wondered if she was thinking of him? I wondered if the hole in her heart was still empty? I wondered if she wondered where he was? I wondered if she looks at every little boy she passes on the street and thinks of that sweet baby she placed lovingly in that hospital four years ago? My heart aches for her. If it wasn't for her loss, I wouldn't have my son today! As I look in his eyes and look and each finger and toe, I wonder if they look like his mother's or his father's. (everything else is like his BaBa...he is all ALLEN in every other way beside physical traits lol) I wish I could tell her thank you! I wish I could let her know that he is ok. That he is a smart, funny, loving boy. That he has had the surgery he needed and he is going to be just fine. That he is LOVED and is not alone. That he has parents that will teach him right from wrong and will always be here for him. I wish I could hug her and tell her all is well. I know that I will never get to do this BUT I have a God who can.

"Dear Lord,

tonight I pray for my Kyle's tummy mommy. Lord please wrap your arms around her and let her know that Kyle is loved. Let her know he is well. Let her know he has a family that cares for him. Let her know that he is safe. Lord most importantly make yourself known to her. In a country that doesn't believe in you, make yourself real to her. Send someone or something in her life to make her give her life to you. Fill the void in her heart that Kyle left with your love. I may not be able to meet her on this side, but give her the opportunity to give her life to you so I can meet her in Heaven. It's in your precious name I pray. Amen"

Thanks for reading this post and I hope you enjoy some photos from the party! More soon as we celebrate his Gotcha day! Hard to believe its almost been a year!

Love, Charmon

THANKSgiving

November 28, 2013


One year ago today I received an email that I will NEVER forget. It was from our agency asking us to please consider the file of this little boy. I remember the exact spot where I was standing when I saw my childs face for the first time. I also remember all the questions that suddenly flooded us too! Was he the one? Was this really our child? Were we HIS parents? I truly believe with all my heart that EVERY child has specific parents out there. We did not make our decision suddenly. It was something that required prayer. We needed an answer from God to confirm that we were the ones for this tiny little boy on the other side of the world! I will forever be grateful to my friends who gave me words of wisdoms and joined in prayer with us that we would have a clear answer. On monday morning I was calling the agency asking them what was the next step to bring OUR boy home.

It has been a whirlwind year for sure! But one I would do over again in a heart beat! There is not one doubt in my mind that God placed Kyle in his "tummy mommy" just for us! God had to give him the special need he had in order for us to be matched with him. It still amazes me the plans God has for us, IF we only listen!

Yes, we still get the questions..."Why China when we have so many children here that need to be adopted?" I always tell them "because thats where God told us to adopt from". God opened my eyes the other day as to another answer to give them... "If you child was in Texas (or any other state that is not the one you live in) and needed a way home...would you go get them and bring them home? or would you go pick up a child right down the steet from you?  NO questions asked...you would go get YOUR child. That is what we did! We got OUR child.

Kyle is doing great from his palate repair. He goes to speech twice a week and he is really improving. He has a small hole that has opened up, but they are going to watch it. Hopefully it will not effect speech and he can just have it repaired when he has his bone graft surgery around age 7. He loved Thanksgiving and we cant wait to see how Christmas goes.

thank you for all of your love and support this last year! We appreciate you more that you will every know.

I will close with a statement that Kyle made last night when we were talking about Santa.  I asked him if he was going to see Santa and sit in his lap? He said "yes momma" I asked was he going to cry "NO!" he says. Then came the moment that filled my heart beyond measure. I asked him "Kyle, what are you going to ask Santa to bring you for Christmas?". He then replied..."nothing momma. I just want to hug him"

Oh to know that he has everything he needs! Love, family and knowing he will never been alone again!

Happy THANKSgiving Y'all!!!

Love
Charmon

4 month update

August 7, 2013

Dear Friends and Family,

As we celebrate four months of Kyle being home, he wanted to update you on things he has learned.  We would not have this BEAUTIFUL little boy without all of your help and for that we are eternally grateful. There is not any doubt that THIS boy was not born to be our child. God hand made him just for us. Thank you for every donation and prayer that was made to help us fulfill God’s plan for us and him! We love each of you!

“Hello everyone! I want to tell you it has been a scary, yet wonderful four months. I wasn’t sure about these strange people who talk funny when I first saw them.  I am a brave boy though and I could see the love they had for me. It only took me a couple of hours to open up and trust my new family. I have made LOTS of memories since April 7^th. I have taken my first airplane ride, came to a foreign land, and was greeted by a lot of people that were very happy to see me. I have my own bedroom (even though I still sleep with MaMa & BaBa), more toys than I have ever seen, and I even have my own clothes and shoes!! I don’t have to share them with anyone!! That makes me so happy! I have gone to the beach and I loved it! I have met lots of new friends and family members.  I LOVE this thing you call ice cream!! It is one of my favorite words to say. I have learned lots of English and if I can’t make them understand what I am saying I show them. I ALWAYS get my point across. My MaMa calls me a smart boy all the time. I love to do crafts, and painting is my favorite. I can ride a bicycle with four wheels, although I don’t know why the ones in the back are smaller than the big one in the middle. I enjoy playing the harmonica with my PaPa. Sometimes I have to hold my nose so they air doesn’t come out of it, but l can also blow it without holding my nose too. I also love to get Jie Jie’s (that Chinese for big sister)iphone and play games and listen to her music. She has taught me lots of funny songs.  I have been to several awesome doctors (they all love me). I had a good report from the eye doctor, and had all of my bad teeth fixed. You should see my silver tooth! I am quite proud of it.I have started my immunizations over just to make sure I am protected. I will have my “ahhhh” (thats what MaMa calls my cleft palate) fixed on August 23^rd, and will have tubes put in my ears to help get rid of something called “fluid”. I don’t know what all that means but MaMa says it is for the best and I trust her.  Please keep me in your prayers. I will get to eat lots of ice cream so I am thinking it is a good thing! I will start going to see someone that will help me with speech after my surgery. That way everyone will understand what I am saying.  I am a funny boy who makes everyone laugh. I am full of energy and have been told I act like my BaBa. I still have some bad dreams at night but my parents always make sure I wake up and let me know I am ok. Hopefully one day I won’t have bad dreams anymore. MaMa has something for my journey called a blog. She will be updating it when I have surgery. You can find it at charmallen99@blogspot.com.  Well I better get back to playing. I have a lot to do before bedtime. I love you all and thank you for helping me get to this wonderful life I have. 

                                                                                                                                                               

Love Kyle”

 

 

Welcome Home! 4/17/13

After an overnight (or should I say 5 hours ) stay in Hong Kong, we are SC bound!!!! We took a private van from GZ to Hong Kong. Along the way we made a pit stop at McDonalds. Who knew you could get corn as a side item. HELLO had me some fries LOL. We went from Hong Kong to Tokyo then on Detroit. Then its HOME!!  Kyle did great on the flights. Poor man beside him had half of him in his lap for some of the trip. I was so thankful he was nice. The flight crew was much nicer on the way over but we did have one good one. Kyle fell asleep before we got to eat, so he kept his food in the warmer until he woke up. We only had 1 1/2 hrs in Detroit to get our luggage, get through customs and immigration, recheck luggage and get to gate. We did it in record time! HERE WE COME!!!

We arrived in Greenville that evening between 5:30-6 pm. We got delayed some because of the bad storm that came in. We were on our way to the escalators to go downstairs where everyone was waiting. Todd had Kyle and I had the stroller. Kris was sprinting ahead of us. Todd stopped me, hugged me and said "we did it". "We went around the world, got our boy, now he is home!!" I was tearing up. We started on our journey and was stopped by a lady waiting to board her plane. She said "You must be Kyle". We confirmed and she stated " you have a lot of people waiting on you sweet boy. Welcome Home."  Again, tears are being held back. No words can ever express the feeling that over came me when we were riding down the escalator and heard all of our "FAMILY" (everyone there I consider family!) yelling and clapping. I lost it right then and there!! (I am not a pretty crier and I was SOBBING!! great look for home coming pictures! lol) My daddy came running to me. He too was crying! He hugged me and all the pressure of the last 8 months was released! Our journey was complete! WE were home!!

THANK YOU to everyone who helped us bring our special boy home!! we can't wait to see what plans God has in store for him.  We love you all!!
Charm